{"id":7982040645873,"title":"How Not To Become A Little Old Lady","handle":"how-not-to-become-a-little-old-l","description":"\u003cp\u003eHow Not To Become A Little Old Lady\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eYou can be little, and you can be old, but that doesn't mean you have to be a little old lady.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWe've all seen her. She's hunched forward, her blue hair is tucked neatly under a plastic rain bonnet, she's clutching expired coupons, and she's discussing her latest health problems over lunch. She's a little old lady . . . and she's coming your way at 2 m.p.h.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003eLittle old ladies have elastic waistbands on all their slacks. They save rubber bands, remember 15-cent McDonald's hamburgers, and have never seen a public rest room that was clean enough.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003ci\u003eHow Not to Become a Little Old Lady\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e\u003cspan\u003eis for any woman who is proud to have escaped little old ladyhood, and it's the perfect, lighthearted gift to give women in danger of slipping into those awful little old lady tendencies. The charming illustrations from Adrienne Hartman perfectly capture the senior syndrome. Say good-bye to little old ladies who pass off their liver spots as beauty marks and say hello to this fresh and fun gift book.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","published_at":"2023-08-15T14:23:30-05:00","created_at":"2023-08-15T14:23:31-05:00","vendor":"Simon \u0026 Schuster","type":"Books \u0026 Accessories","tags":["Book"],"price":899,"price_min":899,"price_max":899,"available":true,"price_varies":false,"compare_at_price":null,"compare_at_price_min":0,"compare_at_price_max":0,"compare_at_price_varies":false,"variants":[{"id":43906779414769,"title":"Default Title","option1":"Default Title","option2":null,"option3":null,"sku":"17963","requires_shipping":true,"taxable":true,"featured_image":null,"available":true,"name":"How Not To Become A Little Old Lady","public_title":null,"options":["Default Title"],"price":899,"weight":283,"compare_at_price":null,"inventory_quantity":19,"inventory_management":"shopify","inventory_policy":"deny","barcode":null,"requires_selling_plan":false,"selling_plan_allocations":[]}],"images":["\/\/www.abodemercantile.com\/cdn\/shop\/products\/8476940-1.jpg?v=1692127411"],"featured_image":"\/\/www.abodemercantile.com\/cdn\/shop\/products\/8476940-1.jpg?v=1692127411","options":["Title"],"media":[{"alt":null,"id":31922532385009,"position":1,"preview_image":{"aspect_ratio":0.904,"height":500,"width":452,"src":"\/\/www.abodemercantile.com\/cdn\/shop\/products\/8476940-1.jpg?v=1692127411"},"aspect_ratio":0.904,"height":500,"media_type":"image","src":"\/\/www.abodemercantile.com\/cdn\/shop\/products\/8476940-1.jpg?v=1692127411","width":452}],"requires_selling_plan":false,"selling_plan_groups":[],"content":"\u003cp\u003eHow Not To Become A Little Old Lady\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eYou can be little, and you can be old, but that doesn't mean you have to be a little old lady.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWe've all seen her. She's hunched forward, her blue hair is tucked neatly under a plastic rain bonnet, she's clutching expired coupons, and she's discussing her latest health problems over lunch. She's a little old lady . . . and she's coming your way at 2 m.p.h.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003eLittle old ladies have elastic waistbands on all their slacks. They save rubber bands, remember 15-cent McDonald's hamburgers, and have never seen a public rest room that was clean enough.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003ci\u003eHow Not to Become a Little Old Lady\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e\u003cspan\u003eis for any woman who is proud to have escaped little old ladyhood, and it's the perfect, lighthearted gift to give women in danger of slipping into those awful little old lady tendencies. The charming illustrations from Adrienne Hartman perfectly capture the senior syndrome. Say good-bye to little old ladies who pass off their liver spots as beauty marks and say hello to this fresh and fun gift book.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e"}